Movies: Lucy

*

Score:  ** out of ***** (D-)

Long Story Short:  Luc Besson, director of the Taken films, gives the other sex a chance for some one-(wo)man beatdown in Lucy.  The film combines the "science" of the brain's potential with Matrix-esque action.  Unfortunately, it does a horrendous job with both of these aspects, and both of the stars, Johansson and Freeman, get swallowed up whole by it.  Avoid.

I thought there would be an even longer (albeit one week longer) gap between movie reviews, but here's another.  The next two weeks will also have reviews - and they, too, will be action films.  Summer is going by too quickly, and I'm already digging into fantasy football... please last a little longer this year, August!  As for Lucy, I wasn't initially planning to see it in the theater (although Netflix seemed a distinct possibility).  I didn't know much about it, something I've been purposely doing the last few years to maximize surprise while actually watching them, but I knew it was some kind of sci-fi in which Scarlett Johansson gets crazy powers.  Cool!  Lucy was directed by Luc Besson and stars Johansson and Morgan Freeman.

Lucy (Johansson) is a young woman studying in Taiwan.  At the start, she is standing in downtown Taipei, bickering with a recent jerk of an "acquaintance".  Before she knows what's hit her, Lucy has a suitcase handcuffed to her, and the only way to get it off is to see a mysterious Mr. Jang.  Hustled through Jang's headquarters, Lucy sense of dread rises - a dread that is confirmed when she learns that she is to be used as a drug mule for an experimental substance.  Along the way to her destination, however, some of the drug leaks into Lucy, causing dramatic changes to her brain chemistry.

From there, it's a race as Lucy tries to recover the remainder of this experimental drug before it falls into the wrong hands.  But Mr. Jang is determined to get there first...

Apart from its two stars, Lucy features a pretty unrecognizable cast - one that adds nothing to a film desperate for any bright spots.  Scarlett Johansson plays the lead, of course, as Lucy.  The most notable part of her performance occurs early on, when she is still just a normal young woman, terrified by her kidnapping by the evil Mr. Jang.  Once she gets her powers, Johansson assumes a blank persona - perhaps understandable given the changes to her brain, but it zaps any emotional connection to Lucy.  Johansson's stoic Black Widow is the life of the party compared to Lucy.  And then there's Morgan Freeman.  Did he even read his part before accepting?  I've heard Freeman is interested in scientific theories, but Lucy is to scientific theory what Animal House is to college life.  No one else has a significant role; there's a bewildered sidekick French cop haphazardly thrown in, and several bystanders spewing unintentionally hilarious lines.

Lucy is a sci-fi action film with a philosophical message (roughly in the vein of The Matrix) that goes horribly awry after the first ten minutes or so.  The filmmaker is clearly most interested in showing what he thinks (or at least would like to imagine) that the human brain is capable of if we could utilize more than the fraction of it that we do.  This has two ridiculous results.  Most obvious are Lucy's new powers, which include control of (and ability to see) any radio or electrical signals, completely control of other people's bodies, and, eventually, time travel.  About fifteen minutes after Lucy starts getting her powers, it's pretty obvious that literally nothing can touch her (other than forced plot devices) and so the drama drops to zero.  The other ridiculous result is that Lucy starts babbling about "knowing everything" and the importance of somehow transferring this to humanity (?).  Freeman picks this up, though he warns that humanity "may not be ready for it yet".  At the end, Lucy tells us "life was given to us a billion years ago, and now you know what to do with it."   Umm, OK.  A good bit of action ensues along the way, but it's all completely pointless since Lucy is invulnerable.

***

Yep, Lucy is a bad, perhaps terrible film.  The most shocking thing about it is that it's at 61% on Rotten Tomatoes!!!!!  Huh?!  I'll admit:  not everything about the film is bad.  The first few minutes are interesting and suspenseful; it's often hilarious (albeit unintentionally - no joke, Johansson at one point calls her mom and tells her "I remember the taste of your milk in my mouth", and her mom's reaction is "OK, sweetie, have a good day."); and it's mercifully only an hour and a half long.  Oh, and I guess it's not morally repulsive or offensive (to me).  Perhaps it's that Lucy's weakest points are my pet peeves.  I'm pretty good at suspending disbelief - superhero films are some of my favorites, for crying out loud - but the "science" and subsequent action based on the film's artificial rules completely took me out of it.  Relatable characters might have been able to salvage the film to some degree, but there are none to be found.  For a more detailed (and hilarious) breakdown of Lucy's absurdity, check out TheAtlantic's review.  And don't fall for anyone who is favorable to it - worst movie of the year so far.

* "Lucy (2014 film) poster" by http://www.impawards.com/intl/france/2014/lucy.html